The Law Of Wasting Energy On Fear

Posted on: November 11, 2007

We’ve all by now have heard of the Law of Attraction, and we know of physical laws such as the Law of Gravity. I’d like to bring your attention to another one. Like the Law of Attraction, it’s been around forever, and like the Law of Gravity it just is. But it will actually be of value to us only if we use it consciously.

It needs to be called something like the Law of Wasting Energy on Fear.

Allow me to explain. We all have experienced fear, concern and worry. We fret, we pace, we ponder…and what does that get us? The thing I notice that it always gets us is a guarantee that things won’t at all be the way we imagined them. It’s amazing. When I go over things in my head that are of the nature of “if he says this, then I’ll say that, and then I can tell him this” the only thing that kind of thinking seems to predict is that the actual conversation won’t sound anything like I imagined.

So, after years of pondering over this, here’s what I’ve decided. It’s a natural law. And that law is trying to tell me to stop wasting my energy imagining how things will turn out. They never turn out that way, anyway! I’d imagine by chance it might every once in awhile turn out the way I imagine…but no, never. Thus, the Law of Wasting Energy on Fear.

I want to make a distinction between fear based fretting and actual visioning. I can, and do, foresee myself succeeding. That’s very effective stuff. That’s using the Law of Attraction in a positive way. But, in a sense, the Law of Attraction is also in play when I fret, because fretting begets more fretting, attracting more of what I’m focusing on. But it doesn’t attract the focus in the way I imagine it, the way positive Law of Attraction work does.

I postulate that this is because when I do good Law of Attraction work, I’m focusing on my “being” place, my intentions, my goals, my desires. With fear, I’m much more focused on my “doing”, on actions, consequences and results.

Fear, and its expression as what we coaches like to call the gremlin, is designed to keep us safe. Unfortunately, our gremlins universally define safe as right where we are. Thus, fear is designed to keep us stuck and running in place. So what actually does move us to action? If not fear, what? I think it’s often either pain or desire that moves us. Otherwise, we just stay on the couch. Something has to shift to make us either want more, or at least not like where we
are. It would be good if we could distinguish between fear and pain. It would be good to notice pain early and move to new places. It would be good to not confuse fear with pain.

So how does this fear and pain thing play out around money? Many folks are in fear around money. They are constantly consumed with There’s Not Enough Money, What If I Lose My House, My Job, My Car and I’ll End Up Old And Destitute. And oddly enough, all that fear seems to mostly keep them doing the same old things the same old ways and yet hoping the results will be different. Besides being the definition of insanity, that’s also a great way to look at fear/gremlin. There is not much movement available there.

What happens when we are in actual pain around money? Well, it’s the same kind of things that happen when we are in pain around anything else. When the pain gets to be too much we do something. We quit the job, we move, we go back to school, we break up. And then fear sets back in…and so we choose a new thing that looks amazingly like the old thing.

Pain can be a great signal that it’s time to do something different. How might you actually distinguish between pain and fear? What would the value of that be to you? What might you be able to avoid? What might you be able to do differently? If you were no longer in fear around money, what might be possible?

Make the distinction between fear and pain. Make a conscious choice to not hang out in either one. Let pain move you quickly and fear be something you stop hanging around with. Do not succumb to the Law of Wasting Energy on Fear.

Shell Tain of Sensible Coaching is a money coach. She works with people, helping them change their habits and beliefs surrounding money, and guiding them towards plenty and prosperity. Shell believes we can all enjoy bigger and fuller lives. She takes you from the crunch to the ka-ching! Shell’s clients range in income, professions, and lifestyles; she successfully coaches individuals, budding entrepreneurs (more than a quarter of her clients are in real estate and mortgage related fields), couples, small groups, corporate teams. Call or email her to schedule a free, sample session; you can also sign-up to join her monthly teleclass.